It's been a year since I left my blog full with "spider webs and dust." It's time to renovate (if I had the tolerance to be patience for editing). Sharpening my writing skills and whining to the web. Clear all my doubts, delete all insecurities and enjoy what the people might enjoy. I had the feeling that the energy from my past and future is suppressing me into the present which I am in now. It's coming to- too good to be true. Because I've been thinking about how I used to express myself a lot by not knowing how others would feel and think. Now I feel nothing and this is a load of crap. What will I write to entertain myself and the readers? (if anyone reads). Now what would I feel? Is life not going to be interesting when I'm heading to motherhood? Or am I just scared?